How to change anxiety by changing perspective

Look at the pictures below.  What do you feel when you look at the first one, and how is that different on the second one?

And the reality is, they are the same stairs – you are just looking at them from different perspectives.

When I stood at the bottom with 1350 steps infront of me, there was some trepidation, definitely an unknown.

However from the top, the perspective was completely different, as were the emotions.

Our experience is completely within our control based on what you focus on.

At the bottom of these stairs, I could have focused on how many steps I had to climb, how hot it was (34 degrees) how safe it was.

Or

I could choose to focus on the next bank of stairs in front of me.  Then there was a hairpin bend before the next bank.  But I could stop at the bend and take in the scenery, before turning to face the next bank of stairs. Each bank, on it’s own, very doable.  Each corner providing a slightly different viewpoint

1.  If you are feeling anxious, it is because your mind is perceiving risk.  To tackle risk, you need a big enough reason to do so.  And the bigger the risk, the bigger the reason (purpose) you need.

The purpose I had to tackle scaling all these stairs was it was unlikely I would ever be coming here again.  This was a once in a lifetime chance and not doing it would lead to regret – the emotion that I believe is the most toxic.

2.  Break the risk down.

I didn’t see this as 1350 steps, but the next 20ish steps in front.  Each flight was achievable.  Each I could see – therefore there were no unknowns.

Maybe you have heard the expression, “The best way to eat an elephant is one step at a time.”?  Start by taking one bite!

3.  Have rewards along the way.

We are brought up with rewards for performance – from sweets from a happy parent for eating all your broccoli!! to bonuses as an employee.  Our mind relates to reward in a positive way and we can use this association to seek rewards as a motivation to perform outside of the normal boundaries.

I could have focused on arriving at the top and what the view would be from there, but from the bottom, the top (and the reward) was such a long way away.  Much more effective in keeping going was the little reward at each twist and turn.

Anxiety will be triggered when you perceive risk.

We live in a dualistic world – two sides to everything.  Eg. up has down, hot has cold, left has right etc.

And this is also true for risk.  The opposite to risk is safety.  The opposite to anxiety is confidence.  And when we feel safe, confidence is the dominant emotion.

So when standing at the bottom of the stairs I ‘flipped’ the risk to focus on safety.

– I knew I could safely climb the next flight in front of me

– There were people who were already coming down meaning that it was safe to climb all the way to the top

– I focused on the fact that there was no time pressure – how fast I climbed was totally in my control.

What we focus on is our choice.

And the choice we make creates our reality

The reality creates the feelings we experience

Therefore our focus creates our experience

Caroline Cavanagh is an anxiety specialist  and hypnotherapist in Salisbury, Wiltshire.  She is an author and professional speaker and would love to talk to you if you would like to know more about her work.